Over the many experiences I have had during a long and productive life, time has taught me that formidable or challenging experiences quite often bear lessons that either shape our developing character or assist in strengthening it. I call those difficult experiences “lessons” because that is what they are. Such indelible lessons were brought home to me by 2 family members at 2 different times in my life: during my childhood and long after I had completed my medical education. I grew up keenly aware of the fact that one of my father’s younger brothers, Enrique, had congenital deafness. He was totally deaf, and early in his life, he also did not speak. This was in the 1930s, and I recall watching my uncle as a young adult sitting on the floor with one side of his face close to the radio at high volume trying to understand the words. His struggle to understand was felt profoundly by our family. At the time, there were no formal medical interventions or support services to consider. My uncle nonetheless persevered, over time learning to communicate and assisted by the love and dedication of my grandparents and other members of the family. During my adolescence, he worked with my father, who was then a judge, delivering documents to various offices. He performed his duties with class and humility. His acceptance of what at the time was considered a major disability was incredible. He never allowed his deafness to be hidden, and with pride he continued work in service to others. Through his perseverance, he reached a level of performance that taught me the value of integrity in life. I was one of his nephews. He treated me with simple affection and honesty and did his best to help me. I have never forgotten his lessons. Whenever I have faced major difficulties or problems in my life, I remember his sound inspiration. The other individual who, in a similar manner, served as a model of determination and refusal to surrender to adversity was my wife’s stepfather, Jack. Shortly after his graduation from college, he developed an infection in his eyes that required bilateral enucleation. Jack was approximately 50 years old when I first met him. He was jovial and seemed to enjoy conversations dealing with a variety of topics. His knowledge of philosophy, politics, and history was great and stimulating. Jack functioned with minimal help, and I came to realize that his disability did not define him. Vivid in my mind was a trip that the 2 of us took from South Carolina to Washington, D.C. Without a map for me to follow, he instructed me with incredible details to facilitate the traveling. For example, he would tell me which highway to take, to look for signs indicating the distance from the next town, how far to go in a given direction, to be prepared for the following turn, and to look for such and such a number at the following intersection. He had remembered the details from many years earlier and did not shy away from being a navigator on that ride. Jack married a divorced younger woman, the mother of 3 children, the youngest of whom became my wife. Because my wife’s mother did not have any financial support following the divorce, she had to work, and the children had to live in an orphanage. After her marriage several years later to Jack, their lives changed; they went to public schools and prospered. A million times I have asked myself, where did Enrique and Jack learn the courage that made it possible for them to live their lives without being overwhelmed by the difficulties of their circumstances? What motivated them to continuously fight obstacles that many of us might consider insurmountable? Instead of living lives of complete dependency on others, why did they choose to become leaders and helpers of others? There should be no doubt that, around the world, millions of people with similar disabilities have accomplished, or will accomplish, much. While further advances in the medical sciences will play a positive role, detrimental effects may be felt as a result of war, accidents, and crime. Education, particularly for children, should be a priority, with empathy, generosity, and love inculcated at a young age. Discrimination, intended or otherwise, must be eliminated. I remain grateful to my relatives who widened my own understanding of one’s capabilities.
Copyright remains with the authors and publisher.
Over the many experiences I have had during a long and productive life, time has taught me that formidable or challenging experiences quite often bear lessons that either shape our developing character or assist in strengthening it. I call those difficult experiences “lessons” because that is what they are. Such indelible lessons were brought home to me by 2 family members at 2 different times in my life: during my childhood and long after I had completed my medical education. I grew up keenly aware of the fact that one of my father’s younger brothers, Enrique, had congenital deafness. He was totally deaf, and early in his life, he also did not speak. This was in the 1930s, and I recall watching my uncle as a young adult sitting on the floor with one side of his face close to the radio at high volume trying to understand the words. His struggle to understand was felt profoundly by our family. At the time, there were no formal medical interventions or support services to consider. My uncle nonetheless persevered, over time learning to communicate and assisted by the love and dedication of my grandparents and other members of the family. During my adolescence, he worked with my father, who was then a judge, delivering documents to various offices. He performed his duties with class and humility. His acceptance of what at the time was considered a major disability was incredible. He never allowed his deafness to be hidden, and with pride he continued work in service to others. Through his perseverance, he reached a level of performance that taught me the value of integrity in life. I was one of his nephews. He treated me with simple affection and honesty and did his best to help me. I have never forgotten his lessons. Whenever I have faced major difficulties or problems in my life, I remember his sound inspiration. The other individual who, in a similar manner, served as a model of determination and refusal to surrender to adversity was my wife’s stepfather, Jack. Shortly after his graduation from college, he developed an infection in his eyes that required bilateral enucleation. Jack was approximately 50 years old when I first met him. He was jovial and seemed to enjoy conversations dealing with a variety of topics. His knowledge of philosophy, politics, and history was great and stimulating. Jack functioned with minimal help, and I came to realize that his disability did not define him. Vivid in my mind was a trip that the 2 of us took from South Carolina to Washington, D.C. Without a map for me to follow, he instructed me with incredible details to facilitate the traveling. For example, he would tell me which highway to take, to look for signs indicating the distance from the next town, how far to go in a given direction, to be prepared for the following turn, and to look for such and such a number at the following intersection. He had remembered the details from many years earlier and did not shy away from being a navigator on that ride. Jack married a divorced younger woman, the mother of 3 children, the youngest of whom became my wife. Because my wife’s mother did not have any financial support following the divorce, she had to work, and the children had to live in an orphanage. After her marriage several years later to Jack, their lives changed; they went to public schools and prospered. A million times I have asked myself, where did Enrique and Jack learn the courage that made it possible for them to live their lives without being overwhelmed by the difficulties of their circumstances? What motivated them to continuously fight obstacles that many of us might consider insurmountable? Instead of living lives of complete dependency on others, why did they choose to become leaders and helpers of others? There should be no doubt that, around the world, millions of people with similar disabilities have accomplished, or will accomplish, much. While further advances in the medical sciences will play a positive role, detrimental effects may be felt as a result of war, accidents, and crime. Education, particularly for children, should be a priority, with empathy, generosity, and love inculcated at a young age. Discrimination, intended or otherwise, must be eliminated. I remain grateful to my relatives who widened my own understanding of one’s capabilities.
Copyright remains with the authors and publisher.